Tim: Finishing a condo bust feature, getting ready for Gitmo.

me: Maybe you should do a piece on the impending Gitmo real estate bust?

Tim: Actually, I’ve got this GREAT condo in Gitmo if you’re interested …

me: Does it have a pool? I’m thinking of taking up waterboarding.

Tim: Oh yeah. And a temperature-control chamber. I mean, a sauna.

me: Sounds lovely. Are the neighbors nice?

Tim: Very quiet. You’ll never hear from them. In fact, you can’t legally have a conversation with them.

me: Perfect. I’ve always wanted to live in a gated community. I hope my illegal Peruvian houseboy won’t raise any eyebrows, though.

Tim: Just make sure he’s never seen with a Koran and he’s probably OK.

me: He’s not allowed to read.