Hey, wow, this is kind of awkward. How long has it been since I packed up my car and left you? Two years? Feels like forever. It really is good to see you again; you look great. We had some good times in the three years we were together.
But listen, DC, I need to be honest with you; Whatever happens this weekend I donâ€™t want you to think it means weâ€™re getting back together. I know you too well, DC. I know you want me to think youâ€™re all Smithsonian and Washington Monument and Cherry Blossoms, but we were together for a long time. I know what you mean when you say â€œDupont adjacentâ€ and Iâ€™ve seen whatâ€™s on the other side of the river. You always found little ways to ruin my day, like when the towering Woodly Park escalator is out and I have to trudge up the metal steps with the 20-degree wind whipping through my coat, or when you promise Iâ€™ll have no problem parking in Georgetown. Every time itâ€™s a lie.
You always say itâ€™s going to be different. Like that time when some crackhead broke down my front door with an ax and the next day you were all, Iâ€™m sorry, baby, I love you baby, but I knew you were never going to change.
Anyway, I met somebody new. Heâ€™s warm, healthy, laid-backâ€¦. nothing like you. I think heâ€™s really good for me, although just between us, he is a bit of a narcissist and can be kind of shallow. But I donâ€™t mind. Weâ€™re great together.
Man, DC, you and I pulled some crazy shit back in our day. We were legendary. If I had a nickel for every Red Line train, every Tortilla Coast margarita, every trip to the Unsafewayâ€¦ but thatâ€™s in the past.
Iâ€™m really looking forward to spending this weekend with you, DC. Itâ€™s been way too long. But I donâ€™t want to get your hopes up. Iâ€™ve moved on. I swear.